knock, knock

me and doors have always had a love, hate relationship. well, honestly, its more like a hate, hate relationship. yes, weird. but i always seem to have difficulty opening doors and usually end up smashing my face or hitting some part of my body when they magically open. its like i do the same thing everyone else does, but they seem to sense my presence and laugh at my efforts to open them. no? you don't believe me? let me give you 2 instances that happened just this past week:

instance #1:
so, i come home on my lunch break and finished up a little craft i had been working on. well, i must document it and take pictures. doesn't everyone? no? just me? oh well. natural light is muy bueno, so i go out on our balcony (we live on the second story), shut the sliding glass door behind me and start snapping shots. i realized i needed something from inside and go to open the door....only the bar that keeps the burglars out at night had somehow FALLEN from the top where i put it and was now keeping me TRAPPED on the balcony. here is an illustration in case you aren't following:


i thought "no way is this happening" i shake the door. nothing. pound on the door. nothing. ask the door to please let me back in my home. nothing. SO, after about 5 minutes of maneuvering and trying to loosen the bar that had so nicely wedged the door shut, i called our office at the apartment (THANK GOD i had my phone in my pocket). why am i not surprised when everyone in the office is at lunch? what kind of office are they running when not even ONE person is left to man the phones!?! ugh. i was so aggravated and of course it was burning up outside on the balcony. so, i called joel twice. no answer. couldn't he sense that i was in danger?!? my better half, my knight in shining armor...ignoring my phone calls! ouch. so i resorted to text and prayer. my text included "call me! i'm stranded on our balcony!!" i did laugh a little when i sent it imagining his expression when he got it. so about a minute later my phone rings and joel is laughing on the other end...LAUGHING! i demanded him to come save me immediately and after he laughed at me for a good while and told me how funny of a story this would be when he got back to work, he came to save the day. stupid sliding glass door.

instance #2:
so, i got approximately 4 hours of sleep last night. i don't know what it was or what was wrong with me, but i could not fall asleep. i tried everything. watched TV, played on the computer, sat and stared at the ceiling...nothing was working. eventually i feel asleep and was late for work this morning. well, i decided to take and early lunch bc i needed a power nap to get me through the rest of the day. so i'm walking up the stairs to our apartment, unlock to door and turn the knob. or well i tried to. the knob was STUCK! so then i tried to turn the key the other way (maybe i just locked it again instead of unlock it...this happens often bc i don't really pay attention to what i'm doing). nope still stuck. sooo i call joel. he answers first ring..."now he answers?!?" he tells me i bent something and it happened to him once and to just keep at it. i didn't have time for that. precious minutes of sleep were wasting away before my eyes. as i stood in front of the door of doom, all i could think about was the air-conditioned room with the soft sheets behind it. so i ran down the stairs and went to the office. thankfully, someone was there. i told her what happened, and the fix it guy was literally in his truck driving off to lunch. we both ran out screaming for him to wait. we caught him, and he came to WD-40 my door knob. i got in and had just enough time to eat a bowl of cereal and head back to work. why me???